Gender identity

[dionysus1999]

A friend on one of my LJ lists posted this interesting article:

http://www.houstonpress.com/issues/2006-03-16/news/feature.html?src=newsletter

It got me thinking about my own unintentional gender mindcrimes. I had long hair when I was a late teen to around my mid-20's. Its been short since then, main reason is I hate the in-between stage so much.

I'm 5'4", and back then was relatively thin (years of going to the gym and junk food have put me in the average build range), so I had a number of people calling me ma'am and miss. This annoyed me back then, but today I find it amusing, I was a gender-bender without even planning on it.

I was a co-moderator for a gender-related bulletin board in college. The other moderator was a young woman who would have called her look butch. She was shaped more like Marilyn Monroe than Rock Hudson, though. She was mistaken for a man based on her clothing and short hair. You'd have to have been blind not to notice those womanly hips.

Had a friend tell me I would make a good-looking woman in college. I know she meant it as a compliment, though I thought it was odd at the time. While I don't have a block head, I don't think anyone would say I have a feminine face. I think I'd make a homely woman.

Although, I'd look less odd as a woman than a transexual who's 6'5".

Why does it seem like male to female transgendered folks are mostly over 6', and the female to males tend to have bombshell figures? My guess is that it's the law of averages, many men are over 6', many women have womanly bodies.

Too bad we can't just swap these folks' bodies, it would save them a lot of trouble with all the hormones and surgery and such.

Comments

[bernmarx.livejournal.com]

The article, like most treatments of the subject I've seen, appear to conflate genderqueerdom and transsexualism as if they're somehow related. I'm inclined to think the only way they're related is that they have something to do with gender identity, but in a significant way, they're opposites. Genderqueers are disinterested in following a specific gender identity, while (in my usually unpopular opinion) transsexuals are as locked into gender identity as mainstream society, if not more so. If it's permissible, after all, for a woman to dress and act in ways that are traditionally male, why would a physical woman need to have their physical gender realigned so it looks like a man's? If I want to experience my feminine side, why do I need breasts and a vagina to do so?

I know that I'm simplifying the issue of transsexualism, but I also think that the queer crowd is usually too ready to dismiss positions like mine as thinly veiled conservatism, when it's not.

Then again, on the topic of genderqueerdom, there are two ways to "break" the rules. One is to proclaim, through word or deed, the existence of such rules, and then publicly flout them. The other is to just simply ignore them. There was a time in my life when I tended to the former, but these days, I'm more inclined to the latter.

[dionysus1999.livejournal.com]

I agree with you, P. One specifically screws with the notion of gender, the genderqueer. Transexuals tend to overemphasize the stereotypical behavior of men and women, which would make it the opposite.

[pstscrpt.livejournal.com]

I think I'd make a homely woman.
I don't think so.

[rikhei.livejournal.com]

I don't think so either!

[simianpower.livejournal.com]

I do. The beard would really look out of place! :)

[dionysus1999.livejournal.com]

Guess I'll just have to dress up in drag sometime and prove it to you. ;)

[yarram.livejournal.com]

Reminds me of hearing tell that both Maya Angelou and the (recently deceased) Octavia E. Butler have both been addressed as "Sir" more than once. Both are tall (over 6') women with contralto voices (Maya's is almost a tenor), but I honestly don't see how you can miss D-cup boobs... :-P

Then again, I also don't know how one can miss one of my MtF friend's boobs when she's not deliberately hiding them. They're not huge, but, well... they're definitely there. :-)

Oh thanks for making me laugh!

[newblksusan.livejournal.com]

I have had folks say that, for some reason, I remind them of Maya Angelou and that I look like a younger version of Octavia E. Butler.

I consider these to be HIGH COMPLIMENTS, indeed, considering that these two women are my literary idols (yep, even had a tribute to Ms. Butler on my blog when i found out she died. . .how tragic and she so totally died too soon). . .

I have been called "sir" as well. It's weird because, I mean --- I just can't explain it. I even mentioned on my blog about how once, while chilling at a gay bar in London, England, a gay dude hit on me and was totally shocked when I told him I was a woman. He admitted it was the first time in his gay life that he had ever made THAT mistake (of hitting on a woman by thinking I was a dude!). I've wondered: is it because I'm tall? Is it because of my voice? Is it because I had a really short afro and favored wearing men's jackets/blazers when I went out (and yes: I can tie a tie better than any man I know. . .learned how to do that when I was trying to imitate Diane Keaton's fashion sense after the movie "Annie Hall" came out). . .

Once, while walking down the street a black dude mistakenly addressed me as "Sir" when asking me a question. I answered him and then walked away. I could hear another black dude say to him, "Yo man, you couldn't tell that was a woman? Man, didn't you check out her tits and ass?!!!!"

I could NOT keep myself from laughing out loud when I heard that one!

Enjoyed reading this and it reminds me of my own gender bending confusion!

[newblksusan.livejournal.com]

I can make this confession since it's in a location where none of my coworkers are likely to ever see it. . .

I have a coworker where, straight up, I had no idea if this professor was a man or a woman or transexual or whatever. I even had students ask me. Now this professor's first name is one that defies any type of gender definition, too so that didn't help.

Also: the fact that this professor was romantically linked with my former supervisor ( a straight up dyke and quite open about it) didn't help either because, again, I didn't know if this prof was a man, woman or. . .?

So for THREE YEARS I was so confused and would sometimes just blurt out (without thinking) whenever this prof said hello to me, "Yo, MAN, what's up?"

Never helped that I never saw this prof go into any of the restrooms (trust me --- many times I felt that would be the ONLY way I would get a 'clue' about this prof's gender).

I swear: it was like working with that character "Pat" from those old Saturday Night Live episodes with Julia Sweeney.

So, finally, I asked another coworker to hip me to the situation because I was just so sick and tired of being confused.

And this professor is. . .a woman.

And I swear if you ever met HER you would never, ever KNOW FOR SURE.

But guess what? I ADMIRE the fact that she comes off in such a way that it is really darn near impossible to tell. Again: worked alongside this prof for three years and could never figure it out. . .Girl Scout's honor!

LOL!!!

Glad you enjoyed the Houston Press article! And thanks for sharing your gender bending experiences!

Re: Enjoyed reading this and it reminds me of my own gender bending confusion!

[dionysus1999.livejournal.com]

I added you as a friend recently, (sorry, didn't realize I needed to check with you first) and I seem to have been excluded from your friends list since your last post blocked me. I don't recall don't anything to offend you, is this an oversight?

here you are

[greyhat.livejournal.com]

I found you on another site, but I couldn't remember what year you had in your LJ name. Found you via fuzzyjelly. So, hi!